Our Saturday

First let me start by saying that my daughter is a beautiful, intelligent, and talented 7 year old. I love her so much! Oh and she is a wonderful big sister!!!! It seems like when people find out what is wrong with her they snap judge (her and us as parents) and try to stay their distance. Like we are contagious or something. So most of the time I don't say much about it.
She has ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) with hyperactivity. The day I am about to describe is a "Normal" outing for us.
We decided to go do a little Christmas shopping on Saturday got through the first store fine. We decided we should go get a bite to eat. Got seated at the restaurant and she started to cough. I asked her to cover her mouth when she coughed. Coughed again not covering. I told her it was not polite to cough with out covering her mouth. Other people didn't want her germs. So she proceeded to cough all over our table then turn around and hack on the lady behind us. I asked her to tell the lady she was sorry. She started to say no and kick under the table. To avoid a major scene in a close restaurant I apologized for her. Guess that made my daughter happy because she stopped and was pretty good the rest of our time there.
Now on to the Dollar Tree. While she was looking at something she laid down her little wallet and walked off . A few minutes later she discovered that she didn't have it. She starts to scream at the top of her lungs in total panic. I walked over to her told her that we would look for it. To that she threw herself down onto the floor kicking, screaming, threw her shoes off and knocked bottles( plastic Thank god!) off the shelves. People were staring ( we are use to that) Of course someone had to say "Can't you control your child" (I so wish it were that easy with her)I managed to calm her down by whispering in her ear "Shhh calm down baby" in a soothing tone over & over. Until I could get her to stand up & walk with me to look for her wallet. She was still moaning loud but was functioning. two isles later we find her wallet. I hand it to her she shuts up and is good the rest of the shopping trip.
This is so frustrating to my husband & I. I think the people around make it worse on us they just need to let us do what we know to do. I feel like I am a bad parent when she does this anyway the comments don't make it any better. Sometimes I just sit and cry after these days (The fits at home can get worse).
We are going to start behavior therapy soon maybe this will help us understand each other better. I do have to say that she has never had a problem at school. We are very thankful for that!! I guess she is just so good at school that she has to vent somewhere. I don't think anyone at school believed me when I told them of her diagnoses. The Dr. was baffled that she didn't act like this at school. He did say that with out some therapy she could start. So we are taking no chances!
Thanks so much for letting me get that out! I have included a link above for those who do not know about ODD. Please I do ask this of you. If you see a child acting up don't automatically assume that the parents are at fault there might just be a problem that they have to handle in a special way.